54 Days Until Star Wars Episode VIII: The Last Jedi-Trailer Reaction

Number one, I had almost given up hoping for a new trailer by the time it came around last week. It seemed that we had been waiting so long that it would never actually come, and I was not constantly waiting for it.
Suffice it to say that the release came as a bit of a surprise to me. I actually watched it on the television as it premiered. Because my dad was watching that football (was it football?) game. I don't watch sports.
Into the trailer now:
Who is truly special? Is it Rey or Kylo? To me, they are increasingly bound up in each other. I don't think that trying to find the ways they are different is useful. Clearly, they are meant to be mirrors, exact foils to each other. Everything that is said to one could be said to the other, and vice versa.
I also love how the lightsaber noise goes into the Imperial theme, which isn't quite the Imperial theme. Clever sound editing! Props to those peeps, whoever they are.
Also, the island is shown under the not quite Imperial theme, which just makes me wonder about what is really going on here.
Clearly, Luke is frightened by Rey because she reminds him of Kylo. But, by striving not to make the same mistakes he did before, will Luke send Rey down the same path? I worry. Luke is not the best at making decisions even in unstressful situations.
Is it any wonder that face shots of Rey shift to those of Kylo and vice versa?
The 'Let the past die' sequence worries me. Clearly, obviously, they have to kill Leia, but I don't want it to happen. And I definitely don't want Kylo to do it. If the goal of this trilogy is to give Kylo a Vader-like redemption arc (and I am not positive that it is), then him killing Leia will make it impossible for to ever like or feel much pity for. They will doom him if he kills Leia. Even though she probably has to die.
Can we just talk about how epic Poe Dameron is? He is really Han and Leia's child. The cockiness and swagger of Han combined with Leia's belief and commitment.
And Finn??? Is he a Jedi? Maybe, maybe not, but he certainly is cool. And it looks like Phasma will actually get to do something, which is what I wanted for her all along.
And Luke's anger. You can hear it and it scares me. Let go of your anger, Luke.
And there it is, the combination of Rey and Kylo. The foils coming together, to create something good, or something horrible. I worry about this movie. They could mess it up so easily. They could destroy it without even really trying. I don't want Luke or Rey to be evil. I don't want anyone to get hurt. I just want everything to be okay, but it might not be. And that thought is straight up terrifying.
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Chorus of the Day!

Not here to lose
Not here for you to choose how we, should be
Cause we're not part of your machine
We're not, we're not part, we're not part of your machine
We're not, we're not part, we're not part of your machine, no

Last Chorus of the Day:
Dirty Laundry by All Time Low

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La! ~SCP

A Reflection on Turtles All the Way Down by John Green

There will be spoilers. I am not writing about the story per say, but I cannot promise that there won't be spoilers.

I didn't realize where I was in my brain until I read this book. While my experience is not the same as Aza's, there are similarities. I am also trapped in the prison of my own consciousness, and it is terrifying down here too.
This book reminded me of the walls. I read it all in one day, and I had to stop halfway through just to cry.
Everything is falling apart for everyone. Everyone is just a mixture of their compulsions, and we label certain people as 'crazy' because their compulsions are weirder than everyone else's. But every character in this book was stuck in the prison of themselves, stuck with their own compulsions and their own confusions and their own problems, and not one of them can truly see past the wall. No one notices Aza's compulsions until it is almost too late, but she also fails to realize that her mother worries over her because she has to. Daisy is compelled to do stupid things with her money. Davis is compelled to worry about his brother. Noah is compelled to worry about his father. And Russell Pickett, wherever he is, is compelled to leave everything to a tuatara, to believe that the tuatara can stop death.
This book reminded me that we are all afraid of something. We are all driven by something whether that something feels like our decision or not.
This was my favorite of John's books. It made me hurt, way deep down, in a way that not even TFIOS could. I can't imagine living with Aza's obsessive compulsive disorder, just like I am sure no one can imagine living with my anxiety. I certainly cannot imagine living with John's OCD, and I hope that he understands that. We are all unable to understand each other, and that is the true tragedy of humanity.
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Chorus of the Day!

Dirty laundry is piling in her room
She's got her secrets, yeah I've got mine too
I don't care about what you did
Only care about what we do
Dirty laundry
Looks good on you

Last Chorus of the Day:
Canyon Moon by Andrew McMahon in the Wilderness

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La! ~SCP

What I'm... No. 15

I'm back with another What I'm... Because I haven't done enough this summer, and I have been reading a lot. I will mention the things I have been doing that don't fit in here are college applications, my online course, and working at the library, which is where I find most of my books, coincidentally. I will also mention that I have in fact pre-ordered John Green's new book, and yes, it was a probably signed copy.

Reading:

Books:

All the Odes by Pablo Neruda

I received this book from my mother five years ago, on my thirteenth birthday. I am just now reading all the way through. I have reached the end and I love these poems. Neruda is, in fact, my favorite poet. The only poems I haven't liked are the ones about Lenin and Leningrad. 

Morning in the Burned House by Margaret Atwood

This was an excellent book. I loved the poetry, but I already knew that I adored Margaret Atwood. The poems are full of emotion and tension, refreshing in their honest look at reality.

Star Wars: Thrawn by Timothy Zahn

This book was amazing! It is definitely my favorite since the new canon was introduced. It was an amazing book that perfectly captured the essence of Thrawn. Timothy Zahn is my favorite Star Wars author, and he just has a great understanding of his characters.

Americanah by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie

This was an excellent book that really made me examine my privilege, helping me understand the world I live in and how my choices affect others.

Alias Grace by Margaret Atwood

This book was an interesting exploration into the nature of truth and lie, and mental health. I loved the book, and I love Margaret Atwood in general.

Homeland and Other Stories by Barbara Kingsolver

This book was very good, but I did not love it as much as Kingsolver's novels.

Listening:

Music:

Paramore

Still love Paramore. They are amazing, and I thoroughly enjoy everything they have written.

Fall Out Boy

While I love Fall Out Boy a lot, I will point out that I expected they would be forced to move their album release backward, and I was right.

All Time Low

I love the Future Hearts album from All TIme Low, but Last Young Renegade was good too.

Panic! at the Disco

I just have to love Panic!, but who knows what is going on with them right now. Who knows what Brendon is doing right now with regards to Broadway and whatnot? Basically, Panic! is continuing to confuse everyone.

Ed Sheeran

I still love Ed Sheeran, and I am still in love with Divide!

Bastille

I have recently started listening to Bastille, and I love Things We Lost in the Fire and Icarus the most.

Podcasts:

Dear Hank and John

Dear Hank and John is just so funny. I honestly laugh so much during every episode.

Watching:

Movies:

Spider-Man Homecoming

THIS MOVIE WAS SO GOOD! PETER PARKER IS MY NEW FAVORITE MARVEL SUPERHERO! I am sorry, Tony. AND TONY WAS AMAZING! AND PEPPER! AND MICHELLE WAS JUST SO FUNNY! AND NED! AND IT WAS JUST SUCH AN AMAZING MOVIE AND I LOVED IT SO MUCH AND I WANT TO SEE IT AGAIN SOON! (May have been overkill on the caps lock. Sorry for shouting. I AM JUST SO EXCITED! Sorry again.)

Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2

This movie was also amazing! Like who doesn't love Baby Groot and Pac-Man and Zoe Saldana and strange Drax insights and THE ELECTRIC LIGHT ORCHESTRA!

Star Trek

Rewatched this movie because Zoe Saldana. And Karl Urban.

Power Rangers

I just want to say that this movie did not suck for a movie about Power Rangers. It paid homage to the TV series without being ridiculous and campy.

TV:

Star Trek: The Original Series

I love this series. It is so great, what with the Styrofoam rocks and painted backgrounds and one set of hallway. Will point out that I still hate William Shatner. Possible post in there, but too long for this space.

Torchwood

So, we finished Children of Earth and, man, was that exhausting and dehumanizing and emotionally devastating. Like, I almost did not make it through those five hours.

Good Eats

I love Good Eats! Alton Brown is so funny, and I love this show. It is funny and light-hearted and still informative.

Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency

I just want to let everyone know that this series does, in fact, stand up to rewatching. It is just as good the second time as the first. Maybe even funnier. Also, there is a trailer for season two!

YouTube:

vlogbrothers

So John wrote a book and Hank is being awesome. John is also being awesome. I just love and appreciate the Green Brothers for making so much amazing stuff that I love.

Dan & Phil

I love Dan and Phil, and... why does Phil look so much like a cardboard cutout in this photo?

Geek & Sundry

Felicia Day's greatest achievement, even counting Charlie. I love this whole channel, particularly Critical Role and TableTop.

Crash Course

One of the many reasons I love the Green Brothers. I am watching Astronomy, World History 2, Physics, Philosophy, Literature, Mythology, Intellectual Property (just finished this one, actually), Sociology, Film History, Big History, Economics, US Government, and Study Skills.

Girl Meets Pixels

I love Girl Meets Pixels' Current Households. The ongoing story of the Hammond family is fascinating and so fun. 

thatsweetsimmer

I have very recently begun watching thatsweetsimmer, but I really love her Current Households and her Legacy Challenge. The Legacy Challenge is making me consider downloading Alpine County.

Mary Kate Wiles

I love Mary Kate Wiles so much! She is so funny and so amazing and I love watching the shows she is in. I am also very excited for the Case of the Gilded Lily.

And that's all for now!

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Chorus of the Day!

Lady, running down to the riptide
Taken away to the dark side
I wanna be your left-hand man
I love you when you're singing that song and
I got a lump in my throat because
You're gonna sing the words wrong

Last Chorus of the Day:

Canyon Moon by Andrew McMahon in the Wilderness

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La! ~SCP

Science O/JINA (Things I Should Have Told You)

So, right now I am in a dorm room at MSU (Michigan State University) for Physics camp! So, two things I should have told you (one of which is this camp) both happened, or are happening, at MSU.
One: I was at the State Science Olympiad competition here in April. So, Science O is a competition where schools get teams together, of kids who like to do science. Team members pick different events, and then compete in those events at a regional. My school won our regional, so we went to states. I competed in Astronomy, Wind Power, and Ecology, and did middling well in all of them. My sister medalled in two events and my brother in one, but they are just middle schoolers. It was super fun, and I basically hung out wiht my friends all day. Except for taking tests. Also I drank several chai tea lattes.
Two: So the camp I am at is PAN, or Physics of Atomic Nuclei. I applied to the camp in April and was accepted, so now I am at MSU with a bunch of nerds who love physics. I'll be honest, I was really nervous at first, but these are my people, and I am really comfortable with them. I miss my family, and my bed, but this should be fun. Even though the rooms aren't air conditioned. Zach, the director, is just a weird physics nerd, and the people are great. I like everyone I've met so far. We haven't done any physics yet, though, so I will check back in at the end of the week with an update.
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Chorus of the Day!

Take all your troubles, put them to bed
Burn down the mission, the maps in your head
Shot like a bullet, don't know the way
The ricochet, kind of got away from you

Last Chorus of the Day:
Crazy=Genius by Panic! at the Disco

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La! ~SCP

Amazing Lines: Paramore: Paramore

So, I've come back with more amazing lines. I haven't done any of these yet in 2017, which I didn't know until I looked it up. Anyway, these are my favorite lines from Paramore's self-titled album:
Fast in My Car

Hollowed out and

Filled up with hate

All we want is

You to give us a break

Source

No one's as innocent as could be

We all fall short, we all sin

Source

We won't try raising the dead

Source

Now

Don't try to take this from me

Don't try to take this from me, now

Source

Feels like I'm waking from the dead

And everyone's been waitin' on me

Source

Least now I'll never have to wonder

What it's like to sleep a year away

Source

But were we indestructible

I thought that we could brave it all

Source

I never thought that what would take me out

Was hiding down below

Source

Lost the battle, win the war

Bringing my sinking ship back to the shore

We're starting over, or head back in

There's a time and a place to die but this ain't it

Source

If there's a future, we want it, now

If there's a future, we want it, now

If there's a future, we want it, now

If there's a future, we want it, now

Source

Wish I could find a crystal ball

For the days I feel completely worthless

You know I'd use it all for good

I would not take it for granted

Instead, I'd have some memories

For the days I don't feel anything

At least, they would remind me

Not to make the same mistakes again

Source

Grow Up

Said I'm done with all my fake friends

Self-righteous pawns in a losing game

Source

Some of us have to grow up sometimes

And so if I have to I'm gonna leave you behind

Source

I'm too tired of always being mad at the world

Source

We get along for the most part

Me and reality, the light in the dark

And we live alone

And two evil worlds

Be in a fantasy

With you and your memories

Source

Daydreaming

Living in a city of sleepless people

Who all know the limits and
Won't go too far outside the lines

'Cause they're out of their minds

Source

I wanna get out and build my own home

On a street where reality is not much different from dreams I've had

A dream is all I have

Source

Daydreaming, daydreaming all the time

Daydreaming, daydreaming into the night

Daydreaming, daydreaming all the time

Daydreaming, daydreaming into the night

And I'm alright

Source

It's not that I won't remember where I'm from

Just don't wanna be here no more

Source

Interlude: Moving On

Let 'em have their time

Sit back and let 'em shine

Let 'em rise and rise

'Cause one day they're gonna fall

Source

Let 'em soak in the sun

Sit back and let 'em have their fun

Let 'em spill their guts

'Cause one day they're gonna slip on 'em

Source

Well I could be angry but you're not worth a fight

And besides, I'm moving on

I've counted to ten and I'm feeling alright

And besides, I'm moving on

Source

Ain't It Fun

You're not the big fish in the pond no more

You are what they're feeding on

Source

Ain't it fun

Living in the real world

Ain't it good, ain't it good

Being all alone

Source

Part II

What a shame, what a shame we all remain

Such fragile broken few

A beauty half betrayed,
Butterflies with punctured wings

Source

Oh glory, come and find me

Source

Dancing all alone

To the sound of an enemy's song

Source

I question every human, who won't look in my eyes

Scars left on my heart formed buttons in my mind

Source

Like the moon, we borrow our light

I am nothing but a shadow in the night

So if you let me, I will catch fire

To let your glory and mercy shine

Source

Last Hope

It's just a spark but it's enough to keep me going

And when it's dark out and no one's around it keeps glowing

Source

And the salt in my wounds isn't burning anymore than it used to

It's not that I don't feel the pain it's just I'm not afraid of hurting anymore

And the blood of these veins isn't pumping any less than it ever has

And that's the hope I have the only thing I know that's keeping me alive

Source

Still Into You

Can't count the years on one hand that we've been together

Source

It's not a walk in the park to love each other

Source

And to your favorite song we sang along, to the start of forever

Source

Some things just, some things just make sense

And one of those is you and I

Source

Anklebiters

You fall in love with yourself

Because someday you're gonna be the only one you've got

Source

Interlude: Holiday

And I'm drinking coffee while I

Read the paper, I've been

Saving money

Eating only top ramen

Source

Now I get a holiday

Wherever I go I must stay

Source

Proof

My heart is bigger

Than the distance

In between us

I know it 'cause I

Feel it beating

Source

And then I'll swim out

To wherever you are

And we'll ride the undercurrent

Down to the floor

Source

Hate to See Your Heart Break

There is not a single word, in the whole world

That could describe the hurt the dullest knife just sawing and back and forth

And ripping through the softest skin there ever was

Source

Love, happens all the time, to people who aren't kind

And heroes who are blind,

Expecting perfect script in movie scenes

Once an awkward silence mystery

Source

For all the air that's in your lungs

For all the joy that is to come

For all the things that you're alive to feel

Just let the pain remind you hearts can heal

Source

[One of Those] Crazy Girls

Now when you say you wanna slow down

Does it mean you wanna slow dance?

Maybe you just want a little extra time to focus

On our romance

Source

Baby, are we really over now?

Maybe I can change your mind

Soon as you walk out my door

I'm gonna call a hundred times

Source

Interlude: I'm Not Angry Anymore

I'm not angry anymore

Well, sometimes I am

I don't think badly of you

Well, sometimes I do

Source

I'm not bitter anymore

I'm syrupy sweet

I rot your teeth down to the core

If I'm really happy

Source

Well I'm not angry

I'm not totally angry

I'm not all that angry anymore

Source

Be Alone

And what if I don't ever want to leave my house?

Stay on the couch while all my friends are going out

Source

Alone

You should be alone

Yeah, you should be alone

You should be alone with me

We could be alone

Yeah, we could be alone

But never get too low on me

Source

Future

So I'm writing the future

I'm leaving a key here

Something won't always be missing

It won't always feel empty, here

Source

That's all I made today! There are only 51 edits in this set, which is a hugely unsatisfying number, but significantly less than last time, if I am remembering correctly.
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Chorus of the Day!

And I said (hey ay, ay)
If crazy equals genius (hey ay, ay)
If crazy equals genius
Then I'm a fucking arsonist (hey)
I'm a rocket scientist (hey hey)
(Hey ay, ay)
If crazy equals genius (hey)
You can set yourself on fire (hey ay)
But you're never gonna burn, burn, burn (hey ay)
You can set yourself on fire (hey ay)
But you're never gonna learn, learn, learn hey!

Last Chorus of the Day:
Island Radio by Andrew McMahon in the Wilderness

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La! ~SCP